For a tart start to our series of essays about Valentine’s Day, we begin with a post by Roz the Unromantic. But even Roz admits that she once did feel the magic of the day. —Ed.
At some point in the relationship, every man I’ve ever gone out with has looked at me sadly and concluded, “You aren’t very romantic, are you?”
I am not. I am loving and funny and loyal. But romance has never been my thing.
Hearts and flowers? Strolling hand-in-hand? Candlelit dinners for two?
No thanks.
Love at first sight? Not for me.
On the other hand, the very first time my sister met her future husband, she knew that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. She was just 18.
Larry was, undeniably, a catch. Nice. Adorable. Sane. Stable. Jewish. Not to mention Harvard pre-med.
But still …
“You’re so young!” I told my sister. “Have fun! Shop around.”
“I don’t need to shop around,” she said.
Apparently not. They just celebrated their 32nd wedding anniversary.
This is a fabulous achievement, and they’re my favorite married couple. And yet, going through life yoked to another person like that, no matter how wonderful that person might be, is my personal idea of hell.
I’ve always been this way.
When the other little girls were drawing pictures of bridal gowns in their school notebooks and dreaming about Mr. Right, my dream was to grow up, live by myself in a fabulous Manhattan penthouse, and write books. (Except during my Emma Peel “Avengers” phase, when I wanted to grow up, chase bad guys with a debonair partner, and effortlessly throw people who got in my way across the room.)
Here’s how un-romantic I was: After Snow White aired on The Wonderful World of Disney and all my 12-year-old pals were singing, “Some Day My Prince Will Come,” I refashioned the lyrics so they’d apply to me.
“Someday my prince will come,” I sang, “ and I’ll tell him to fuck himself.”
Despite all of this, as a child I adored Valentine’s Day.
Every year my sister and I would spend hours crafting handmade valentines for every kid in class from every art supply we could get our hands on. Construction paper. Glitter. Ribbons. Doilies. Stamps. Stickers.
Each was a personalized work of art. If your pal Suzie loved Barbies, you’d draw them on her valentine. Patty was into horses? You’d festoon her valentine with Palomino stickers. Doug, who loved Mad magazine, got an Alfred E. Neuman valentine. For our very best friends we composed poems of the “Roses are red/violets are blue” variety.
On Valentine’s Day the class took turns going around the room delivering valentines to the shoebox “mailboxes” on each desk. Then we opened them.
What a great moment! It was nothing but treasure. Glittering store-bought cards. Elaborately crafted handmade cards. Vintage old-timey valentines. Dozens of little heart-shaped candies. Poems and notes and messages from your best friends. Sprinkle-covered heart-shaped cookies. Pink-iced cupcakes.
It was something I looked forward to all year. But it wasn’t about romance. What did we know about romance? We were in elementary school. For us, it was a celebration of friendship.
When we hit junior high, Valentine’s Day stopped being about friendship and began being about True Love. And I stopped caring about it.
Mark, the man in my life, is more romantic than I am. (Everyone is.) After years of patiently waiting for me to come around, he has come to realize that, as wonderful as he is, I’m never going to wake up one morning, look deeply into his eyes, and start singing “You are so beautiful to me.”
But we do exchange tokens of our affection on Valentine’s Day.
Because he’s an artist, and bookish, I’ll get him a pricey art book I know he wants but is too frugal to buy himself.
For years, he gave me a Whitman’s Sampler each Valentine’s Day, until I finally confessed that I don’t actually like Whitman’s Samplers. “I save them until the candy gets stale,” I told him. “Then I throw them out.”
So now he makes me a gift—a painting, a collage. or a hand-crafted, three-dimensional piece. Something creative and unique, just for me.
Which, come to think of it, is a lot like those handmade valentines I so loved as a kid.
So, to a certain extent, with Mark I’ve come full circle.
And yet I sometimes think about trying to reclaim the joy I used to feel on Valentine’s Day. Why does it have to be exclusively about Romantic Love? Why can’t those of us who just aren’t into that emotion (or who are between partners) be inspired by our grade-school selves and celebrate the friends we love?
Not that I plan to go around handing out glittery handmade construction paper hearts to all my pals.
Although, perhaps I should.
I’m thinking of going with something even more outside the box. I’ve consulted the website, and I see that I can express my appreciation for our friendship on this special day by purchasing a llama for a third-world family in your name.
Or, if we’re not quite that close, how about a hen?
We non-romantic types can start a new Valentine’s Day tradition! While others exchange romantic gifts and walk hand-in-hand on a moonlit beach, the rest of us can say, “Thank God for our friends,” and exchange celebratory poultry.
Roses are red/violets are blue/I’m so glad we’re friends /here’s a chicken for you!
Happy Valentine’s Day.
Image via
We have many Rare Chicken Breeds for sale in Elgin Illinois,
including Sussex Chickens, Welsummer Chickens, Turken Chickens and more.
Be sure to check out the Bargain Specials, as you can combine different
egg layers in smaller amounts and buy as an assortment. Elgin
Illinois also has poultry equipment for sale, game chickens for sale in
Elgin Illinois, bantams for sale, ducks for sale, geese for sale,
turkeys for sale, guinea for sale, peafowl for sale, pheasant for sale,
chukar partridge for sale, bobwhite for sale, many different breeds of
baby chicks for sale in Elgin IL.
Thumbing through a baby chickens for sale in Elgin Illinois
catalog is a yearly traditions in many houses. My kids and I eagerly await
the Murray McMurray Hatchery catalog. We love looking at all the cool and
different chicken breeds available. Catalogs are free so head on over to
their site and request one if you are interested.
Typically hatcheries online offer both standard breeds
and bantams. Bantams are fun hardy little chickens, they lay tiny eggs
that kids especially love collecting. Bantams typically weigh less than 2
pounds when full grown. Just like ordering anything online there are pros
and cons to ordering baby chicks online. Pros of buying baby chicks in
Elgin Illinois * Big Selection - If you are wanting a large
variety of different chicken breeds and egg colors, you will find the best
selection at an online hatchery. * Both Bantams and full sized chickens
available * You get to choose what sex you want. If you want a mixture of
both male and female then choosing a "straight run" will save you money
and you will get a mixture of male and female chicks. You can also choose
all males or all females too. * Weekly specials. Hatcheries have sales on
chicks, you are likely to get a good deal if you are flexible with the
breeds you are wanting. Cons of buying baby chicks in Elgin
Illinois * Order early to get the best selection. Certain breeds sell
out fast, sometimes as early as 6 months in advance of shipping! If you
are wanting a certain breed it's best to order your chicks in the fall
before their orders sell out.
Quantity - you must order a certain number of chicks. Typically hatcheries
will require you buy a minimum of 25 chicks at a time. The number is
necessary for the chicks survival during shipping. All 25 chicks are put
in one small box without heat. They are crowded in the box and produce
enough body heat to arrive in good shape. * The wait - If you choose to
buy chicks from a feed store you will have them the same day but if you
choose to go with a hatchery you have to wait until they are ready to ship
and then wait for the chicks to arrive. Ordering baby chicks online in
Elgin Illinois is easy and has always been a very pleasant
experience of me. It can be a little frustrating waiting for the chicks
but it's so worth the wait. When the post office calls and you hear all
those little "cheeps" or "chirps" in the background you'll know the wait
was worth it! How to Care for your new baby chickens in Elgin,
Illinois Baby chicks are extremely
cute and also
difficult to withstand,
but it's finest to prepare for their
arrival prior to you obtain them. Prepare first
by collecting not only the
correct products, yet
also the appropriate
understanding to care for
them. Raising baby chicks is reasonably
easy, you just have to provide them with the following: A tidy and also warm
environment Lots of food as well
as water Focus and also
love Habitat Your environment can be a straightforward box, fish tank,
pet cat carrier, or guinea
porker cage. Line it with old towels and also
blankets (without loose
strings!) to start, and also after a
couple of weeks make use of straw over paper.
Keep in mind: Avoid utilizing just
paper or other slipper
surfaces-- or your chicks legs could expand
misshapen. You additionally need
something to dish out food as well as
water in, such as a chicken feeder and water
dish from the feed shop, or a pickle container
cover for food as well as a family
pet bird water dispenser from a pet shop. Additionally, as the chicks get
older you could present a perch
right into the environment to get them
trained on perching. Heat To
maintain your chicks warm you need to
provide them with a warmth resource.
This could be as easy as a 100 watt
light bulb in a reflective clamp design lamp from an equipment shop, or an infrared reptile heat
light bulb likewise work very
well (my
referral). Chicks need this
warmth 24/7 until their downy fluff is
replaced with plumes (which can use
up to two months). The freshly
hatched need a temperature level
between 90 and also 100 degrees,
and also every week this could
be decreased by
around 5 degrees or
so. The warmth resource need to get on merely one side of the cage
to allow chicks a variety of
temperature levels. The chicks are your best
thermostat- if they are hiding in the
opposite corner of your warmth
lamp, you need to
decrease the temperature level. If
they are smothering each various other under the
warmth (not merely curling up),
you should add some heat.
House cleaning
Cleanliness is essential as
well as it keeps your chicks healthy and
balanced. Make certain to transform
the bed linens
frequently and also
consistently provide tidy
food and also water Food and also water.
Chicks expand quite quickly
which needs lots of tidy
food and also water. Offer
enough at all times as well
as check
frequently to prevent dehydrated and also
starving chicks. Chick food is various compared
to grown-up chicken food, as well as it is available in both medicated as well as non-medicated varieties. Feed chick food for the
very first two months, then
switch over to a raiser food (~ 17 %
protein) for one more 2 months,
then to a somewhat
reduced protein feed or a level feed
(if you have layers). Soil Some chicks want
to obtain a head start on taking
dust baths, while others won't use up that activity until they are
older. If you have the room in your chick
room, introduce a tray of sand or
filth for them to shower in.
Attention and love There are a
few advantages to spending quality time with your chicks. First off, they will certainly probably bond with you as well as
not escape as adults. Second, if you
examine your chicks daily as well as
view their behavior, you could
catch illness or other issues previously. Watch out for hissing, limping, or
various other undesirable
indications. Make certain to
also check out
their poop, as looseness of the bowels can lead
to matted plumes and also clogged cloaca.
Last but not least, it is very
important to keep an eye out for social concerns, such as the
smallest chick getting picked
on. Vacant nest disorder So your
chicks are currently fully feathery
and also its time for them to leave the
safety and security of your residence
and also move outside into a
coop. Check out our
section on chicken cages to learn more
about coops as well as
appropriate cage environments.